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LOVE: Connect to Your Supporting Cast

OPENNESS: “If you know people, that’s home.”

Movie quote from Harry and Tonto (1974) – Harry Coombes (Art Carney)

harry and tonto70-year-old Harry Coombes (Art Carney) did not want to leave his apartment in New York, one he shared with his wife for more than 50 years. Since her death, he clung to his home and his cat Tonto as a cradle of memories from days gone by. When the police forcibly remove Harry from his condemned tenement building, he is left with a sense of homelessness and uncertainty about his future. Fortunately, in the beautiful movie Harry and Tonto, Harry remains open to the changes that life inevitably brings. This openness saves his life.

FRIENDSHIP: “It doesn’t make sense to leave home to look for home…to say goodbye to friends you love just to make new friends.”

Movie quote from: American Graffiti (1973) - Laurie Henderson (Cindy Williams)

american graffitiFriendships develop when individuals share life experiences.  They deepen when those experiences are meaningful.  Great friendships emerge from emotionally charged life activities like travel, college, enterprise, war, sports and 'being a teenager'.  When you are young, you have more time to share experiences with others.  This gets much tougher when you enter the more responsible phases of life.

TEAM: "You've got a gift, Roy, but it's not enough. You've got to develop yourself."

Movie quote from: The Natural (1984) - Roy's Dad (Alan Fudge)

naturalRoy Hobbs joins the hapless New York Knights midway through one of the worst seasons in the team's history.  His contributions and genuine love of the game inspires everyone to perform better.  Some may say the story of The Natural is another example of sappy and unrealistic Hollywood hype.  I know that it is one of life's great ironies that every great team begins its journey to success through the efforts of one inspired and inspiring individual.

FAMILY: "Family is the most precious gift we are given...Turn your back on them and that is when you truly have nothing."

Movie quote from: The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (2005) - Yia Yia (Maria Konstadarou)

sisterhood 2A 'family' does not have to be made up of blood relatives.  In truth, your family is that defined collection of people who are there to support you, no matter what.  For some people, their birth family plays that role.  For others, like the young women in The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, their family is made up of friends with whom they have shared life's ups and downs.  Families are not born; they are earned.  We each can assemble our own unique family to support us as we face life's challenges.

DESIRE: "We pursue that which retreats from us."

Movie quote from: The Tao of Steve (2000) - Dex (Donal Logue)

taoDex (Donal Logue) has three rules for being irresistible to women.  Given his abundant scorecard, all those who seek multiple bedpartners should take heed.  Dex is overweight, over talkative, and terminally semi-employed, yet women continue to end up in his bedThe Tao of Steve is really a way of being cool.  Unfortunately, 'cool' becomes hollow over time, even for witty intellects skilled at manipulating human desire.

COMMUNICATION: "Ninety percent of what you're saying isn't coming out of your mouth."

Movie quote from: Hitch (2005) - Alex Hitchens (Will Smith)

hitchAlex Hitchens (Will Smith) is a date doctor who teaches lovesick men how to hook up with the woman of their dreams.  His basic message is that women want to meet a good man and good men present themselves to women in a certain way.  'Hitch' teaches men how to adjust their persona to become the man she is attracted to. Unfortunately, Hitch doesn't understand there is a much less complicated way to truly get your message across to someone else.

LOYALTY: "It isn't about dedication and loyalty, it's about belief in what we do."

Movie quote from: The Good Shepherd (2006) - Edward Wilson (Matt Damon)

shepherdIn The Good Shepherd, Edward Wilson (Matt Damon) is a loyal citizen in the secret service of his nation.  As a foreign agent, he gives up traditional life to enter the empty world of espionage.  For Wilson, loyalty is an obligation not a choice.  It is a thankless value that leaves him emotionall numb.  No film has better portrayed the tragic emptiness of unquestioned loyalty.

INFIDELITY: “This can’t last. This misery can’t last. I must remember that and try to control myself.”

Movie quote from: Brief Encounter (1945) - Laura Jesson (Celia Johnson)

briefBrief Encounter is the first major motion picture about infidelity.  It was banned in Ireland in 1945 because the film honestly explored infidelity rather than condemning it.  Bad call by the Irish.  If the censors really wanted to discourage infidelity, they would have required every person in a relationship to watch the movie.  It reveals the great pain of secret love.

HUMAN INTERACTION: “Only if you find peace within yourself will you find true connection with others.”

Movie quote from: Before Sunrise (1995) - Palm Reader (Erni Mangold)

before sunriseBefore Sunrise is one of my favorite human interaction stories.  Jesse (Ethan Hawke) is an American traveler on his way to Vienna to catch a flight back home.  Celine (Julie Delpy) is a French student on a journey to Paris to attend classes at the Sorbonne.  They meet on the train and are attracted to the uniqueness of each other's character.  They decide to spend a night together, exploring Vienna and their own souls.  What transpires is a great study of how truly good a relationship can be for two dynamic people.

ASSUMPTIONS: “Discrimination – formulating opinions about others…based on their assumed characteristics."

Movie quote from: Philadelphia (1993) – Joe Miller (Denzel Washington)

philadelphiaYoung children see the world with open eyes, observing each circumstance for what it is.  As we age, we make more assumptions about things, based on prior information or experience.  Gobs of assumptions are made daily about people who align with various cultural, religious, ethnic, and/or sexually-oriented groups.  The inhumanity of these assumptions is examined in the film Philadelphia, the story of a lawyer dealing with the bigotry of his employers.      
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